Monday, 24 January 2011
This is something that I'm sure everyone is aware of, and I know that we get a pretty good laugh at most of them, but I think that it's about time someone asked 'what the fuck is going on?'
Far too often now, when a new night is announced, someone releases a record or has recorded a mix, you are greeted not only by the essential details of what's on but you are given a free history lesson on the DJ/Producer. Now this would be okay-ish if it gave you some interesting information but it is always the same generic, meaningless background story (filled with superlatives), and it keeps getting worse..
Now I'm sure that the majority of folk who do this, care about their nights and invest a lot of time, effort and money to put them on.. Why then, do they have absolutely no pride or shame when it comes to promoting it? Does it really mean THAT much to get more views on the forum?
Do they really think, that having a 2 page essay on DJ A is going to convince you to spend your money?
Maybe you think differently, but if I haven't heard of a DJ, a page of generic text is most definitely not going to change my mind about going to the gig, never mind the cringeworthy drivel that you get from some promoters.
So have a read at the next few quotes and decide for yourself. If you read this, does it have you convinced? or does it leave you wondering what the fuck they were thinking?
* All of these are real and relate to house and/or techno, and can be found online
"Both DJ's displayed a fantastic knowledge of tracks when they last played ?, so we couldn't think of better pair to link together to kick start the night"
And how did they display this knowledge? A quick Q&A? I think that displaying a fantastic knowledge of tracks is a little bit misleading...
"Glasgow based DJ ? is rapidly gaining a reputation for his talents playing tech music. Possibly the most versatile and technically talented DJ we've come across, able to play a set seamlessly, combining a variety of different styles, with ease. Be it techno, minimal, tech house or deep house, he'll play it, if the time is right, and the crowd wants it. "
I'm almost certain that was written by the DJ, but if it wasn't - why would you even think about having it on your profile?
"Sometimes, no introduction is required."
This preceded 4 paragraphs about Ricardo Villalobos... c'mon?
"The ? lads have been putting in a sterling shift on the local club scene around Glasgow and have hosted some great nights around the city. Bringing something different to every night, the resident DJs mix it up with anything from Upfront House to some nice Techno beats adapting to give the crowd what they want. With their early success they have a promising future ahead, being booked to DJ at nights in 2011 such as ? & ? and supporting Stereofunks monthly residency @ Level 2."
I would read that one a few times..
"? talent knows no bounds, and musical knowledge is unsurpassed. To add to all this, his DJ talents are as impressive as his productions - can anything hold him back in 2011?!"
How can people write this and expect to be taken seriously?
There are tons of nights & DJs doing this kind of thing, most of them far too long to post on here, and I think it's getting out of hand... Seriously, get it together, it's embarrassing.